The book (Saph's journal)

My favourite place is the Black rose garden. I love just sitting there, feeling the breeze! And I get to clear my thoughts..And sometimes I dream that someone would just sit beside me and hold my hand, and tell me the things I want to hear. Haha, jokes! Sounds alot like heaven to me...

Tell me...

I opened my eyes, but still, I was blind. Everything was white, just plain, untouched white. I couldn't blink because I had no eyelids, when I looked doen, I didnt even have a body.
"Hello?"
-silence-
I watched enough movies to say "Am I in heaven?", I started laughing to myself at how stupid I sounded uitil a surrounding voice boomed at me,
"No"
"Oh shit! I'm in hell?"
-silence-
And then a less dominating voice replied me,
"You're just dead"
"What?"
"They're not gonna make the same mistake again"
"What mistake?"

When I was born, I was dead, I came up in two places at once, I had commited no sin, I popped up in heaven. Inexplicably, the doctor's who deliverd me managed to bring me back, and I fell straight back to earth. My birth was chaotic, how could you go to heaven and come back down? It was broke the 'treaty' that the departed are to stay departed. So hell sent up a few of their minions just to return the favour.
I asked the voice everything, and I got all the answers I could ever want, more than I even asked for.

I could 'see' because in my seconds in heaven I saw spirits, and it became part of my sight.
"They couldn't touch you, so they played with your sleep"
"So why'd they stop?"
"Because they found something more valuable, something they 'can' get."
"What? What was it?" I was starving for knowledge, I knew this was my only source.
"They were after Saph."
"Saph?! They stopped for Saph?"
"Saph had a twin sister-"
"Why Saph?! Her sister killed her! Selphie! They should be after Selphie-"
"Yes, they were...



The angels stood on one end, tall, bright, clean and the nether ones stood on the other, broken, charred, very much dead, both were called upon to collect their souls. Because both of them departed in the same period, both sides met. One was to be taken below for murder, and only one was to be taken above for being victomised in innocence. Sapphire was aware her sister was going to hell, and she learnt in church it was eternal torment. Inspite of the murder, she forgave, forgot, and gave her place up in heaven, the ultimate sacrifice, for Selphie. Saph was good, and hell's finger couldn't touch her. So she remained on earth, all this while.

"Why can't she go up?"

"Because her seat is taken..."

"Is there no way?"

"Her sister will leave, for purgetry and burn"

"Hell?"

"No, The flame which purges sin, and her seat will be ready after"

"She can come back soon"
I had so much to digest, so i decided to ask a lighter question,

"One more thing... do you use toilets in heave- A burst of wind shot forth into my face and a huge hand of light grabbed and threw my from wherever I was, straight into my body- "AH! Eyes opened, I sat up, catching a first breath."
"He's awake!" There were cheers and commotion all over. I was just waiting for an answer. I looked at the crowd of medics, left and right, and caught sight, behind a box of first aid- equipment. I got up, "Wow kid! lie down!" but I didn't listen, and heaved my revived corpse all the way to the field.

Chad's Journal

Ok... A song... what's there to write? Things around me, nice things... rainbows? hahaha ok, i can do better... Mesmerizing eyes? Strings of my heart> What am I writing? hahaha. Anyhow, I just saw a doctor recently, Dad took me, coincidentally, I had some ruptured vessel at the left ventricle of my heart- whatever that meant, in simple English, it meant 'no stress'- so much easier said than done...

General Paper

The thoughts of that kiss lingered on, and I wouldn't think it would linger away anytime soon. It was GP class and the entire class was seated in two neat rows, I was seated on the front seat of a totally different planet. "Class! will you each take a copy of this article? Since this terms theme is about family..." I didn't catch the rest. I was enjoying my foeld trip around the milkyway, but I was pulled back by a web of sighs and shaken words of sympathy. "Thanks Ms Leong" I took the article and turned to Josh.
"Why's everyone so Ugh?"
"Read the article dude.."


'When does sibling rivalry get out of hand, and for those who's differences can't be seen... This tragedy has left fifty-two year old Mr Jason Craig Paralysed after suffering from shock after the breaking news that his-' "So what's the srticle about again Josh?" I asked, hoping to get the two second summary from him, but he hadn't finished the article himself, "Read the article.". "Right, thanks."
I wish I had been my stubborn self and continued bugging him for the detailess summary. I resumed reading and I became anchored to the cold earth, my galaxy field trip vanished. "No!" I shouted! Everyone was stunned at the random expression. Ms Leong rushed over and asked, "What? what happened?" "This didn't happen!" I threw the article on the table and dashed out of the classroom. I didn't know where I was running to but I made for the canteen first, then the hall, then every single classroom, completely oblivious to the way I was barging in like a loose mental patient and vanishing like they just saw a mirage. I ran back to the canteen and started looking under the tables, and I could feel my vision grow blur, my eyes become heavy, and my cheeks become drenched. "Saph!" I stood in the middle of the canteen, surrounded by a crowd of completely puzzled students, "Saph!" I screamed, but she didnt reply. "no..." Blur became black.

continuation to the article-
'his two twin daughters, Sapphire and Selphie, 17 were found dead in Kingston Park just yesterday'

Bye?

Weeks passed and I survived, night after night. I had grown out of the phobia of running into mailmen and grown further in the relationship between Saph and I. It had become a routine for us to take turns paying for dinner, besides the closing gap, nothing else changed, not even her insistence that I couldn't send her home.

"Hey Saj, wanna get something to drink?" I asked, out of courtesy. "Nah, thanks, gonna get a drink for Saph too?" he replied, laughing and shaking his head after. "Right" I acknowledged, and made my way. Natasha had just bought a stack of economics notes and was walking back to the table. "Hey Nat, seen Saph?", "Never see her!". I had to ask Saph something.

Faster than I could remember, we were walking from dinner again.
"Saph"
"Yea?"
"Where were you in school today?"
"Lessons?"
"Hmmm... alright"
"Haha, why?"
"Nothing... Well... I was just looking for you, that's all." I said, with a smile.
"Oh, what for?"
"... I"
"Hmm?"
" Was.. just wanted to check if we were gonna meet for dinner", Why couldn't I have thought of a better excuse?
"We meet every night? Jokes."
"Actually, I just missed you" I whispered to myself.
"What?"
"Nothin!" But I know she heard me.

"Well, here we are.. cya Saph"
"Yea... I wanna buy a drink first"
"It's kinda late, why dont you just drink at ho-"
"Hold on!" She ran off and returned as fast as she did with a bottle of half frozen coke. The thought of her sudden odd craving for frozen softdrinks amused me.
"Ok! done, see ya tomorrow!" She waved and began walking off. She had a habit of never letting me finish what I had wanted to say, I had a habit of finding it cute.
"Oh wait!" she stopped, walked back-
I asked, "Forgot somethi-" My question was interrupted tremendously with a cold(frozen coke I guess) kiss (she skipped away straight after), which sent my mind spinning and my body went numb. I stood there "Did she just..- no...-yes! no! Hahaha! Did she?!Long after she skipped away, i finally stretched out my hand, "Bye?"

O'z dpttu dod

"Morning papa!" I was buttoning the last button of my shirt and at the same time inspecting my appearance in the mirror, "That'll do". Fortunately for me, my dad was more than happy to send me to school for waking up late. I shoved my feet in my brown 'adidas superstars' and unlocked the door. "I'll go down first papa!", "Alright son" he replied. I opened the door and was startled at the sight of a mailman, a large broad man with dark rings around his red swollen eyes and a sharp long nose which stood out between his bony cheeks, who was just about to knock on the door. What was he doing here so early in the morning? "Good Morning Chad..." He knew my name? Totally by suprise, he stretched out his right hand , grabbed my neck and started choking me. I kicked and mauled his arm in a futile effort to release his dead grasp trying to squeeze through his grip a "Let me go!" but all I managed to achieve were hissing noises escaping my lips. I felt the last remaining seconds of breath expend as he said in the most demented voice "I know you see me! I know you see us! Djr od pitd!" My dad opened the door and saw me shivering on the ground wiith tears all over my face.

I told him I fainted, having being asked to see a doctor was bad enough, I didnt need anyone to recommend a psychiatrist, I knew I wasn't mad. That wasn't a dream, my dad saw me. Are they becoming real?

By twelve in the afternoon, I was bored to death, but too weary to do anything normally. The small thought of my morning encounter made me twitch. I spent my afternoon sitting in a corner, trying to piece together all my dreams and find the link to the 'mailman'. It became so demanding on my mind that unknowingly, I fell asleep, which by then I would have begun to want to avoid.

I returned to the bench, the dreaded scene of Saph murdering her helpless friend. Everything was frozen in time like it was waiting for me to recollect and recognize where I was now, and it continued.

The stabbing continued, there was blood splattered all over Saph's arms and behind the gushing and slashing sounds, I could hear sobbing. I think she was crying, I don't think she wanted to kill. But Like one murder wasn't enough, she took the very same blade... and slashed her own wrist. Suicide by guilt? The seconds on her life were slowly ticking away. She kneeled over her friend's dead body and removed her scarf. No, it wasn't possible... it was Saph too. My mind was spinning, nothing made sense at all, my life felt like a box of puzzle pieces from all different boxes. Then the murderer leaned over and said softly, loud enough for me to hear, "O'z dpttu dod" The last word echoed continuously and I slowly opened my eyes.

Another drea-... Nightmare.

A mild gust kicked up a whirl of leaves around my bench while I indulged in a cheeseburger. The night was chilly and the crickets sanng proudly in the background. The park was very much empty, lifeless like the grave which surrounded it, distinguished by a rusty fence. I guess I just wanted some time to myself but there was company. Two people were walking pass me, both girls with scarfs across their faces, best friends I suppose, both dressed in identical outfits, A Timberland sweater, a pair of Lee jeans-It had a huge 'Lee' across the knees, and a pair of black boots. They very much caught my attention, being the only things which were alive in the park. Both of them were laughing and kicking leaves at each other. It was a pleasant sight at first to see people in their youth, happy as they are... until one of them removed her scarf and smiled at me. Saph? The other girl was still laughing to herself as though the other was right beside her. The smile wasn't a happy one, it was wicked. When she blinked, both of her eyes entirely became pitch black as she pulled out from her pocket a knife, long enough to be mistaken for a short sword. I froze, in fear, in horror and again I couldn't move. My mind was running in every direction and chanting. "No, no don't kill her, Saph! don't kill your friend! Or me!, Put it away, please!" Nothing told me anyone was going to get hurt, but I had the worst gut feeling that that knife was going to be used. When her 'friend turned around, it was too late. The unsuspecting victim let out a shriek of raw pain which shattered the peaceful atmosphere, Saph had already lunged the blade far enough for me to notice the purtrusion from the back of her jacket. "No Saph!" I screamed! For the most damned reason, I still couldn't move. It was torture having to see something so terrifying yet not be able to do anything, not even run away. Saph continued stabbing the girl. "Leave her alone! Saph! Saph!"I was screaming, in my mind. The last thing I heard before I awoke from this nightmare, was the victim saying with her last breath, "Draqjor, eju?"

Note!

Hey People! Just wanted to remind you guys that the story begins from the first entries at the bottom so you're gonna have to read from bottom up! Do leave comments too yea=) Cheers!

Another day, not.

The next morning was hard to get through, I was still freshly traumatized by the most recent nightmare. I had a hard time taking down notes, and a even harder time trying to look like I was paying attention. For the first time however I noticed Saph in the same lecture hall as I. She turned around and I waved. Saj sat to my right and Natasha to my left, Josh behind me and Ken to his left. The seating positions were perfect, except in front of me where there was Sasha and May who were unsurprisingly talking about 'hot guys'. I wouldn't have minded if they had such loud conversations during recess when I'd be ten tables away, but I had to put up with it every lecture and tutorial. No, they don't always sit in front of me, but they being a few seats away don't change anything. Halfway through the lecture I was called up by the lecturer, "Chad! please be considerate." I was completely clueless to why she called me, but I then figured out that the noise she heard originated from the two "beauties" in front of me who just refused to 'shut up'. Apparently, they were speaking at a volume which made their voices unspecific but loud enough to be heard. So i was the unsuspecting 'random victim'.Saj turned over "Haha, lucky you are!" I was too busy with my own thoughts to be bothered by the lecturer.

Nat: I'm so bored
Saj: Yea, me too
Me: I'm so bored
Nat: That's what I said.
Me: Oh... haha alright
Lecturer: Chad! One more time!
Josh: Haha, poor boy
Me:...
Nat: Chad, you performing for the concert?
Me:...
Saj:I think he doesn't want to get busted.
Me:hmmm...
Josh: Yo guys wanna go for lunch later?
Saj: Yea!
Nat: Sounds good!
Me: Maybe.
Lecturer: Chad... I want to see you after this lecture
Me(whispering): Shit!
Saj and Nat: Poor Boy!

Once the lecture hall was cleared, I got an ear full for talking too much. Being someone who isn't in need of the teacher's attention, I took it all. Saj and Nat waited for me outside and gave me a warm welcome of laughs upon my exit from the hall, from which we made our way back to the usual spot. I remained at the table to take care of their belongings and Saph came over. "Hey Chad! How's your morning?". Pretty wonderful!" I replied! "That's great!", Saph obviously didn't catch the verbal irony I was using. "Anyhow, Saph, how'd you get inspiration for writing lyrics?" I asked. "Well,"-She took a deep breath, ready to give a speech- "I just write down how I feel about something, someone, anything, everything! Relate it to the things around you, colors, shapes, like a painting" She smiled. I smiled back. "Well, I'll catch you around!" She ran off. "Ah.. Bye?", I don't think she heard me.

Today we were released early because the J2s had a preliminary examination in preparation for their 'A' levels. Saj and Natasha had to stay back because they ran into some trouble with the math teacher, for talking in class. "Haha, poor guys" I thought jokingly.

I walked to the Train station like I always do, but at the crossing I saw Sapphire. She was talking to an old man who wasn't looking at her. "Hey Saph, what's up?". "Oh, hey... It's nothing, I was just helping this blind man cross the road, he's going to the station, you are too right?" she replied. I smiled to myself, "Yea, I'll take him" The three of us walked slowly, quietly to the station and I passed the man to one of the kind passengers who was going to the same stop as him. "That was really nice of you Saph" "Nah, I just wanted to help, makes me feel great!" she said, stretching her arms out, like she had just made a great achievement.
"Saph, you going anywhere now?"
"Nope... are you gonna ask me out?"
"Huh? What?"
"Nothing!"
"Haha, wanna watch a movie?"
"Yea sure!"

We watched 'Far away', which I initially thought was about two people in love who met while going to two far away places and are finding their way back to each other. Instead it was about two people who fell in love and were torn apart by circumstances they couldn't avoid, the male protagonist died in a car crash after pushing the damsel in distress out of harms way. The idea was quite unoriginal, but the sacrifice involved was great enough to make Saph cry. Don't get me wrong, I was watching the movie, but when I turned to see Saph's reaction, I witnessed a tear roll down her cheek.
"I hate the ending!" Saph said, wiping her eyes dry.
"Yea... the poor girl. I hope you enjoyed it!
"I sure did" She sniffed.

I took her to dinner at 'Long John's' again, and she still refused my offer to send her home. I actually believed she'd give in, which explains why I was at the station till eleven and got home after twelve.

My entire family was fast asleep so I sneaked in with muted stealth- if my parents found out I came home so late, they'd ground me for good. After all the 'body maintenance' I finally got to bed, lying flat on my back, staring at the ceiling hoping for something to happen when the phone rang.
"Hey Chad!"
"Hey Saph-"
"Thanks for the movie!"
"Your welcome! haha I'm really glad you liked it"
"..."
"Everything ok?"
"Yea... I really enjoyed myself"
"What are you thinking?"
"Nothing... really"

The hesitation in 'nothing' made it obvious enough that there was something up, and when a girl says 'nothing' anyone who knows better would hear it as 'something', sometimes even 'everything'.

We talked about the movie and shared our twisted feelings about the unfortunate ending, then we moved on to other movies. I can't remember why there was so much to talk about but we talked alot. When I put down the phone, I looked back up at the dark ceiling and it occurred to me. "I think... I think I like her..." I said to myself. I knew i was right, because before she called me, when I was staring at the ceiling and hoping for something to happen,... I was hoping to see her again.

Chad's Journal

Awe man... The fine line drawn between my reality and dreams is getting too fine. Last night was so real. My face kinda hurts but it can't be from that dream... Two huge men, monsters... one victim... me stepping through some... should i see adoctor? hahahahah! ok not funny... dreams dont do that to you. What's up with that wierd book anyway, seems kinda interestin but kinda personal too... dont feel like returning it. Cant anyway, dont know who it belongs to... Owe... damn! did i kiss the wall at night or what?! jokes... gonna paint soon.
Oh man! there's a school concert coming up! I dont feel like going... Mr Lim did ask me to go sing a song or two... ah wells, till next time.

2 Arrivals, 1 Path

"Here you are! It's a boy! Wait, he's quiet.. Doctor!"
"What's wrong?" the lady screamed.
"Calm down mam, calm down, we're gonna do everything to make sure your baby's alright."
"No! Please!"

The place was cool with a constant morning breeze and it was bright, there was a panel of four people, a jury, it was a 'court room'.
"He hasn't even lived his first minute..."
"No he hasn't"
There was a discussion of loud booming voices, from entities in the form of blue flames.
"He can go back..."
"He can..."
"But he has arrived on both worlds at the same time."
"But he'll be different... He'll see more"
"He will..."

*Back into the delivery room*

"Mam clam down. He's Alright"
The doctor said, with a hard earned smile
"Thank You doctor!"
"My pleasure, what are you gonna call him?"
"Chad, my Chad."

Stepping Through

"Hey Saj! you seen Saph anywhere?" I asked with obvious anxiety.
"Nope, I never see her" Saj replied, amused.
"I was supposed to meet her"
"Really? Happy searching!"
It was after school and I hadn't seen Saph the entire day yet. Calling her mobile didn't help because there was no connection for the most inexplicable reasons. Have you ever had those times where you can never find what you're looking for until you've told yourself you'll never find it, in time at least? I waited till five for her to show up, or call, or both, to no avail. As I walked out the school gate however I heard someone calling me from behind, that voice, It was Sapphire!
"Hey Saph!"
"Hey Chad, I'm really sorry for being late!"
I laughed, "It's ok, what did you want to see me about?"
"I've been spending like half a century loafing around so... Yea, I just wanted to hang out" She smiled.

I took her to dinner at 'Long John's' and we talked about anything, too little time for everything, but I had a good time. I learnt that she isn't a big fan of eating, loved walks on cool quiet nights- helps her think about life, but i was most interested in her song writing passion. She wrote songs when she was happy, when she was sad, there was always a song for every occasion. She even promised to sing a song for me some time soon. But she was very secretive about where she stayed or her family, a broken family probably, and I'd probably never know.

"By the way Saph-"
"Yea?"
"What's your CCA? Your in... Net? Soccer? Volleyball?"
There was a second of hesitation before she replied.
"Yea.. I'm in volleyball"
"What's wrong? Don't like it?"
Her hand rose to push away her fringe but I felt it was more of a movement to shelter some sort of uncertainty.
"No, It's nothing" She replied, with an unassuring smile.

Saph refused my offer to walk her home, so much that she refused to move until I got into the train, which explains why we were at the station for two hours, mutual stubbornness. I wondered why she was always seemingly so uncertain about the things around her, she was hiding something.

Upon coming home, a shower, some left over chips and I walked into my room. I was exhausted. I leaned on my door frame and something black caught the side of my eye. I turned and there was the black diary, the one which did not belong to me. Curiosity flipped the book to a random page, curiosity read the random page.

"The uncreatable is being repaired
My senses slowly impaired
I want to go home
I need to go home
Begone to where you've come from
Let me go back home"

It didn't make any sense to me, at that time, it didn't need to, i chucked it on my table and lunged myself towards my bed, straight into a field, this time it was bright.

I guessed it had been morning. And there again, a black figure. It walked to me and said "Hello" I've heard that voice before. From which dream was it? Two more figures had appeared, also black, but they walked to the first figure instead. To my horror the two shadows took out grey chains and locked up the first shadow, screaming to be released. I was screaming too, also to be released, I too was held down, by chains I couldn't see. "Go Away! Let.. let her go!" I leaned forward as hard as I could, with all the might I could possibly conjour and slowly, I was diffusing through my barrier. My vision was blurring as my face, my body was being pulled back and I leaned forward even harder. I made it! My vision became clear again, but everything was in negative, the morning was dark, the shadows now had faces. The two abductors were men, one whose face was covered in unhealed lacerations, oozing green puss while the other's was a burnt bark with only one eye to the left of the face. Naturally, I wanted to run straight at them to let their hostage go, but their faces completely took me aback, they were disgusting, gruesome. Their hostage's face was hidden by long bronze, mildly curled hair, a girl I guessed. I had to help her. I swallowed a prayer "Lord protect me" and ran straight at the two savages, sending the one with the charred face to the ground. I turned around to check if the girl was alright. I saw her face. "Behind you!" I turned to a whip of steel, slashing my face."Ahhh!" I screamed! And sat up, back on my bed, trying to catch a breath. "Where- where" I was swinging left and right, I knew I was home, but it took me awhile to stop looking for that girl, "shit!" I forgot her face.

A Recent Entry in 'The' Book

"I sang in prayer, please let me in,
I've waited enough for thee so great,
On my knees I bow to thy power
Let thee be thy pillar thy tower,
Another prayer i make for thy blessed space
And I be there for my prayer's place"

Something Wrong

I felt like a convict, boarding a caged vehicle which would transport me to some prison, guilty of scathing my impression on my friends. Tapping my credit pass, I weaved through the thick crowd to find a standing spot, but instead, I found a seat, inexplicably unoccupied almost as if it were deliberately left vacant for me. I sat... only to look up to a hundred eyes staring straight back at me. The strangest sensation ran down my spine like a millepede. I had no idea what was going on, no suprise. I swung my head around, seriously, everyone was staring at me. Was the seat meant to be vacant? I stood up but the eyes remained on me. "Is oy joz.."One by one they began what seemed like chanting, fixed in their places. "od oy him.." And it became louder. "What? What's wrong?" i said, and then shouted. It seemed as though so many things were happening at once then the driver suddenly hit the breaks, i was thrown, not just at the crowd, but through it. I diffused straight through their bodies, and the heads turned, following my suspended animation but none moved a muscle to catch me. I fell hands down and tumbled to the front, pushed myself up and the driver leaned over " Are you ok? Damn van, bet it was a lady! Really sorry boy" "Yea, i'm ok... it's ok" But really, it wasn't. I felt as if when the driver hit the breaks that I was thrown into another bus because the bus was now empty.

I got off the bus once it reached Farright Ave, and dragged my terrified body home past the usual diner, across the highway, past the signboard "Highway to hell", past th- I swung my head back, " highway to heathrend", I was seeing things, too many things to count, straight to my door.

By the time I had gotten ready for bed my nerves were wrecked beyond recognition and my heart had become numb from all the beats it had skipped. I closed my eyes, and again my heart skipped to the ring of my phone. "Who in heaven's name would call me at this- Oh... Hi Saph... What's up?"
"Hey Chad, sorry for calling so"
"It's ok really"
"I just wanted to..."
"to?"
"Can we hang out after school tomorrow?"
"Are you askin me out?"
"huh?"
"I'm just kiddin!"
"Alright, see ya tomorrow" i said with a sleepish smile.
"Thanks"
"Your We-" She hung up.
I fell asleep with my head on the phone.